3 Cozy-Looking Sweaters That Say, ‘HAHA, I’m Actually Itchy AF’
“Hee hee hee, you’re so dumb, I’m an itchy fucker!”
How to Wear Gingham Without Being Mistaken For a Picnic Table
If you’re in a gingham blouse holding a wicker basket, you can’t blame people for believing you’re a picnic table.
5 Hairstyles That Will Have People Saying, ‘That Must Have Taken Hours’
“So you must’ve had to sit still for a really long time, huh?”
4 White Shoes To Buy So You Can Have One More Thing to Constantly Worry About
Just buy these shoes to wear around the house.
How to Get Rid of Under-Eye Circles by Going Back to When Obama Was President
If for some reason you’re unable to time travel, rip out your eyeballs.
How to Base Your Entire Beauty Routine on .05 oz Sephora Samples
Head to Sephora every day for the rest of your life to collect free samples to use the next morning!
5 Chokers That Say, ‘I Need To Take Small Sips Right Now’
You’ll look so beautiful even though you’ve made it impossible for yourself to drink.
Off-The-Shoulder Tops to Wear as Soon as You Pop That Weird Back Pimple
Bacne is totally normal, but you should definitely always try to hide it!
Plaid Skirts to Help You Dress Like An Insolent Lil’ Autumn Bitch
As you sashay away, they’ll think, “That outfit looks warm” and also “Wow, she sure looks like a little bitch.”
Sexy Panties That Definitely Won’t Cover Your Whole Box
These panties are all sexy in a way that is not how regular women are shaped!
Stunning Heels Perfect For Trotting 10 Feet Behind The Group
Look sleek and sophisticated as you scream, “Guuuys, wait up!”
Chunky Flatforms That Look Great on Teensy Elf Women Made of Spun Glass
Chunky flatforms aren’t just for supermodels—they’re also for women who look physically fragile!
These Adorable Dresses Will Make You Wonder If USPS Tracking Is Anything More Than A Wild Guess
When you’re done online shopping, just throw your tracking number straight in the garbage. It doesn’t mean anything at all!
Wide-Legged Pants You’ll Never Get Out Of Alive
You’d think it would be easy to remove like a skirt, but there’s a thing in the middle and it’s complicating the whole situation!
4 Chic Blazers To Wear At Work Until Someone Says, ‘Hey, Nice Blazer’
Just wear one of these blazers until someone compliments it and then take it off and move on with your life. Get it, girl!
How to Be So Hot The Necessary Act of Eating Makes You Relatable
Your enjoyment of dessert will become a life preserver of relatability to which people will cling!
Trend Alert! It’s Time to Bring Back Low-Rise Jeans And Your Teenage Insecurities
It’s time to bring back those low-rise jeans AND all of the worst of your teenage insecurities that went along with them!
5 Cute Side-Swept Bangs to Rid You of Your Depth Perception
You’ll be the chicest woman in the room who can’t determine where things are physically situated in space!