DUDE CORNER: I Refuse to Give Up My Subway Seat For Any Pregnant Lady I Didn’t Personally Knock Up I shouldn’t be forced to give up my seat for some waddling pregger that I DIDN’T personally cause.
I’m an Introvert, But Boy Do I Like It In The Ass Boy, can I get down with some sweet deep asshole penetraysh.
I’m Actually Mixed: Half-Gemini, Half-Taurus Both sides are important and have made me the woman I am today.
I’ve Finally Met The Man I’m Going to Divorce Someday And by lifetime, I mean a year, maybe two years tops?
My Sugar Daddy Just Wants Me to Get Good Grades Kind of like a regular daddy, but without all the baggage.
Getting a Brazilian Hurts Everywhere – Except For My Tough, Tough Asshole My incredibly tough and sturdy asshole feels nothing at all.
I Need to Know Who Bit Beyonce Because I Just Wanna Talk to Them I just wanna have a few words with them.
How I Got Everyone to Shut the Fuck Up About Their Standing Desks With My Standing Toilet Trust me, it works.
How I Use Movement to Show Everyone in This Coffee Shop That I Teach Yoga I’m a yoga teacher! And I need everyone to know that!
I’m Slowly Learning Who I Am, and Honestly I Don’t Care For Her I really believe that if I wasn’t me and I met me, I’d hate me!