I’m Celebrating Valentine’s Day By Letting Myself Be a Martyr
I would rather be dead but specifically in a way where I’d be remembered for it
What If It Was Your Sister Or Your Mother? And By ‘It’ I Mean This Three-Toed Sloth
A man simply couldn’t understand the problem unless you bring his family into it.
My Body Type Is ‘Soft Pastry’. Here’s Why.
I hope young girls with soft pastry bodies out there read this.
How I Became Successful By Clicking From Tab to Tab Until 6PM
People are intimidated by my work ethic.
I Believe Women, Except When One Tells Me Old Navy Has Good Denim
If a woman tells you that Old Navy jeans are a good fit, DON’T believe a bitch.
Yasss! Black Women are KWEENS, Unless They’re Talking About Something I Can’t Relate To
I Moved to L’Oreal’s Lash Paradise And Honestly, It’s Fucking Amazing
Right now, I’m lying on a beach chair, wrapped in a towel made of crepe batter. And yeah – my lashes look fucking amaze!!
My Self-Care Is Just Me Sorting Myself Into Ravenclaw Over and Over Again
The only way to deal with the slog of womanhood is to go online every night and take Harry Potter quizzes.
How I Finally Learned to Love My Curly Pubes
Not everyone can have stick straight, blonde pubes like a movie star.
What I Learned From Not Having Sex For A Whole Year And Then Three More Years
I didn’t know you could survive this long without dick.
I Watch Figure Skating Once Every 4 Years But Trust Me, I’m An Expert
I’m basically qualified to coach.
I Lived It: Black Twitter Came for Me
All because of my low-fat, low-salt, quinoa-butternut-squash-asparagus-kale-ezekiel-bread homage to soul food mac and cheese.
I Can’t Cum Unless Someone Calls Me a ‘Voracious Reader’
Nothing gets me like being told I am a good and avid reader.
I Believe Women, Unless They’re Talking About Me
You can respect them but definitely don’t believe what they say about me because it’s wrong.