Uh Oh! Friend Scrolling Through Your Photos Getting Dangerously Close to the Ones You Took to See if You Are Symmetrical
How to Stay at a Friend’s House Without Apologizing the Whole Time Remind yourself that it’s actually more annoying to apologize a bunch.
Spring Cleaning! Donation Pile Dutifully Moved From Corner of Bedroom to Living Room She’s moving the pile out of her own space and into everyone else’s space.
Woman Figures Single Use Plastic Less Bad if She Uses It Way Too Many Times “Single-use plastics are 100-use plastics in my home, baby!”
Scary! Younger Brother Is Someone’s Best Friend’s Annoying Boyfriend “My god, I have full body chills.”
Woman Would Have Awesome Thoughts if She Were Comfortable With Even One Minute of Boredom “Why would I opt for boredom? Boredom sucks.”
How to Wake Up Earlier Even Though That’s Going to Make Your Day Longer Attempt to find joy in being awake and alive?
4 Grounding Techniques That Are Not as Effective as Throwing Your Computer Out of an Open Window That felt good, huh?
Red Flag? This Man Has a Dry Erase Board in His Bedroom but No Ideas You were able to make out the phrases “toaster for pizza” and “pilot?”
Woman Rewarded for Time Spent in Waiting Room With More Time Waiting in Exam Room “I don’t even have any snacks. I’ll probably die here.”
QUIZ: Should You Say Hi to the Person You Know in This Coffee Shop or Panic and Just Start Flipping Tables? “Oh god. I need a quick and loud distraction.”
Why It’s Impossible to Get Anything Done in the Government Unless You Want to Do Bad Stuff Good moves slow and bad moves fast.
Coffee and Period Join Forces to Provide Woman With Most Destructive Poop of Her Life “They’ve really created something special.”
Artsy Friend Reluctantly Accepts Role as Hairdresser of Friend Group “She takes amazing landscape photos, so I’m confident she’ll be able to cut curtain bangs.”
How to Build Community by Waving at People When You’re on a Boat You’re on a boat, and people will love that about you!
‘Beards Are Makeup for Men,’ Says Man Who Should Literally Just Try Makeup “I don’t know if he realizes that ‘makeup’ is also makeup for men.”
4 Gifts for Your Unresponsive Friend That Are All Portable Chargers New iPhone is a great second option though!
Brave! Umbrella Leaving House Knows There’s an 80% Chance It Doesn’t Make It Home “He doesn’t wish to leave his family behind but he knows that you need him.”
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