How to Not Feel Threatened By Babies Even Though You Should Be Realize they’ll probably look as bad as you when they’re older.
How to Explain Eyebrows to Straight Men Introducing them to the concept of eyebrows will likely take longer than you expect.
How to Do Work Every Day When You Really Just Wish it Was Field Day and You’re On the Tie Dye Team This will make looking at Excel for eight hours straight seem almost as much fun as doing the wheelbarrow race with all your friends.
Here’s What Happens to Your Body After Just One Week of Not Being Such a Little Bitch All The Time You may even find yourself in a better mood, which will contribute to you not being such a little pissbaby.
QUIZ: Are They Actually Toxic Or Do They Just Casually Use the Cry-Laughing Emoji? This woman is a danger to society and likely a danger to herself.
Can My Pet Weasel Get Coronavirus? Meet the Woman Making Sure She Can and Does My arch-nemesis is making sure my pet weasel not only can get covid but absolutely does.
QUIZ: Is It Persecution for Being a White Christian or Consequences for Domestic Terrorism? You feel uneasy like everyone’s against you and the walls are closing in, but is it persecution?
QUIZ: Do You Share the Same Sense of Humor Or Are You Both High? We laugh at everything. Queen’s Gambit was hilarious.
3 Mid-Century Sofas to Request From Your Mid-Century Sugar Daddy Upgrade your apartment (and maybe your allowance) by requesting one of these lovely mid-century sofas!
5 Grilled Chickens That Wish They Were Fried The chicken – it wanted to be enjoyed. Why did you do this?????
QUIZ: Do You Want Children or Just an End-Of-Life Plan? See the great potential in this human vessel to make you soup in your sunset years.
5 Plastic Surgeons That Have Denied My Request for a Fucked Up Little Tail Down for anything my tailless ass!
How to Respect People’s Stupid Fucked Up Little Boundaries Remind yourself that ultimately, we’re all a little stupid and fucked up.
4 Scented Candles That Make It Smell Like You Bake Muffins In the Room Where You Poop Make it smell like you’re whipping up baked goods in the room where the dookie exits your butt, and that’s good.
How to Resist Screaming ‘You Don’t Even Know Me, Do You???’ When Your Mom Asks for Holiday Gift Ideas Be grateful for what you have – a Mom that is just kind of … there!
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