QUIZ: Are You Entering the Dark Night of the Soul or Did You Just Miss the Train by a Couple Seconds?
4 Vaguely Gothic Images to Look at Because You’re Too Much of a Little Bitch to Watch Horror Movies
You’re too weak – keep looking at these trees.
QUIZ: Are Your Communication Problems Because of the Mercury Retrograde or Are You Just High All the Time?
How can thoughts be clear…? Like, as opposed to opaque?
Polite Ways to Ask Your Grandfather What It’s Like Being an Orphan
Say, “Your parents are dead – talk more about that.”
How to Tap into Your Divine Femininity So Your Dealer Gives You Extra Weed
Speak in a feminine, delicate, breathy voice.
How to Keep So Hydrated That You Anger Poseidon
The wrathful Poseidon, son of Cronus and Rhea, will surely feel as though you’re coming for his thing.
How to Go to the Farmers Market Without Being Like, ‘I’m at the Farmers Market!’
You’re kinda saving the world.
How to Quit Vaping Until You See Someone Else Vaping
Vaping is great, but it’s also really, really bad for you (sad!)
How to Be Friends With Someone Who Exercises on Vacation
There’s no need to subject yourself to that kind of negativity.
How to Decorate Your Apartment Even Though It Doesn’t Have a Fireman’s Pole so What’s the Point
Then you can have guests over without being totally ashamed.
How to Stop Your Child From Participating in Discourse
Curiosity isn’t wrong, but discourse isn’t right.
How to Get Into Embroidery When You’re Traumatized by The Scene From ‘Coraline’ Where They Sew the Kid’s Mouth Shut
Good luck with that!