I LIVED IT: My Actions Became My Habits, and My Habits Became My Character
For some people, this might be a good thing – but for me, it was devastating.
How I Reject the Consumerism of the Holidays by Spending a Bunch of Money All Year
I am never not spending money.
DUDE CORNER: Please Ask Me if I Think a Hot Dog is a Sandwich, I Have a Whole Thing Ready
Buckle up, because I’ve got a whole spiel on it and you’re gonna wanna hear it.
Why I Wish the 911 Operator Would Just Listen and Not Rush to Offer Solutions
Is it so much to ask for empathetic communication?
I’m a Hot Smalltown Baker and I Simply Don’t Have Enough Cum in Me to Fuck All You Corporate Lawyers This Season
I’m sorry, but I’m just one hunky, sweater-wearing man.
I LIVED IT: My Mom Used My Brother’s Name as Her Password
The part that hurt the most for me was the fact that my mom told me this without hesitation.
I LIVED IT: There Were ‘No Replacements Found’ for the Word I Misspelled
It seems the whole Apple enterprise is dead set on making me out to be a damn fool.
How My Seasonal Dandruff Helped Me Get Into the Holiday Spirit
The first fall of dandruff always gets me in the Yuletide cheer.
I LIVED IT: I Couldn’t Tell if My Laundry Was Wet or Just Cold
No one should ever have to go through something like this.
How I Escaped Today’s Rapid Trend Cycle by Dressing Like Mr. Tumnus
I take my style cues from a dapper little half-man, half-goat.
I’m Not Just a Pretty Face – I’m Also Ugly Feet
I’m tired of people ignoring my fucked up feet time and time again.
How I Accepted My Flaws as Part of What Makes Me a Believable Character
I’m always going to be a little fucked up, because that’s what the average viewer likes to see.
Why Public Transportation Needs to Be More Efficient Between Me and The Person I’m Fucking
I refuse to ever be stuck in a 20-minute train delay while wearing itchy lingerie again.
Here’s Why Big Pharma Needs to Be Stopped, Unless They Start Making More Adderall
I am willing to turn a blind eye to all of the corruption if they make more of it, and fast.