Man Who Prefers Brunettes Only Talking About The White Kind “I’m allowed to be attracted to a hair color!”
Phew! Liz Posted A Video Update On Why She’s Been So Quiet On Here Lately Thank God, Liz! We were worried about you these past few days!
Mom Just Checking In To Make Sure You’re Not Vaping “We still don’t know the second hand effects, so I’d rather you not be in a room with someone who’s vaping.”
‘Pads Feel Like a Giant Diaper,’ Says Woman Stuffing Wad of Rough Cotton Up There “I just can’t see how people sit in their period blood all day!”
Uh Oh! Flaky Friend Actually Following Through On Plans “I’m excited that we’re actually gonna hang out this time!”
‘I Know Exactly How You Feel,’ Says Friend Who Is Actually Thinking of How She Feels No one is expected to know how anyone else is feeling any time soon.
Yikes! White Friend Asking Uber Driver About His Ethnic Background Hannah shows no signs of stopping.
Putting Plastic Ballsack on Car Found to be Among Safest Ways to Express Masculinity “We have determined it’s safe, but technically speaking it is still very, very disgusting.”
Woman Playing It Cool Around Grocery Store Samples Shandra Voight is playing it incredibly cool in spite of the fresh samples being put out at her local Whole Foods.
BREAKING: Mom Wants You To Come Over And Take All 73 Abandoned Origami Sets In Your Childhood Bedroom Or she’s going to throw them out soon.
Boyfriend Squeezing Your Boobs To Try To Make You Feel Better “I dunno, maybe I need to grab her boobs more softly.”
‘I Could Never Live in a Big City,’ Says Hometown Friend, Again “I can still come visit you for a weekend sometime though, right?”
Employee Just Glad Mistake Wasn’t Her Fault “I’m just gonna get some fro-yo and like, be grateful for a minute.”
REPORT: Dream Means Exactly What You Think It Means If you think to yourself, “Is this about my dad?” yes, of course it fucking is.
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