Wow! This Woman Is Okay IRL, But Her Online Presence Is A Car Accident
“It’s so weird because actually speaking with her face-to-face is so pleasant,” says Higgins.
Amazing! This Celebrity With Actual Shit Running Down His Leg Is Running for Office
“I’m interested to hear what he has to say about the country and also about the shit running down his leg.”
Brave: This Woman Doesn’t Care Entire Restaurant Can Hear Her Threesome Story
Dinelson received annoyed looks from diners who couldn’t hear anything over her explanation of seeing a clitoris.
Wow! This Woman Actually Called Her Grandma on Her Birthday Instead of Just Instagramming a Photo of Her
“I knew that I wanted everyone to know that I had a grandma and that it was her birthday,” says Roche.
Wow! This Princess Took an Edible and Woke Up 100 Years Later to a Prince’s Kiss
The edible was so strong. She never really stood a chance.
Amazing! This Woman Spent A Whole Massage Thinking About How She Should Relax And Enjoy It More
“I can’t stress about enjoying the time I’ve set aside to not be stressed.”
Sob! This Poem’s Gorgeous Line Breaks Made Us Feel More Than Its Dumb Words
The content doesn’t matter!
Inspiring! This Girl Couldn’t Get A Job, So She Became A Career Coach
Talk about beating the system!
Whoa! This Retinal Implant Allows Scientists to Show Their Dicks to Blind Women
“Watching a person see your dick for the first time is an incredible experience,” says inventor Dr. Mark Wooten.
Inspiring! This Woman Decided to Leave Her Corporate Job Because She Was Fired
“It’s nice that Rebecca’s so optimistic, but I’m concerned that she doesn’t understand when her health care will end.”
Wow! This Woman Earned an MFA Simply by Pronouncing ‘Vase’ Like ‘Vahz’
“I’m going to start my art as soon as possible. I’m on my way to ‘Tarjay’ to buy supplies right now!”
Wow! This 17th Century Woman Pretended to Be a Man So She Could Do Improv
She perfected her male mannerisms well enough to first infiltrate an actual improv team!
This Coy Woman Is Playfully Touching The Bottom Of Her Boyfriend’s Shorts In Public As If We Don’t Know She’s A Big Ol’ Sex Maniac
She’s a lil’ nasty freak!
Aww! This Child Has The Uncanny Ability To Make Comments That Exacerbate Your Specific Insecurities
‘Woah Tanya, that’s a big pimple!’
Incredible! This Woman Found the Hidden Sea Cave Where People Go to Get Relationships
“We knew she’d find her way to the sea cave eventually.”
Inspiring! This Woman Never Misses A Day Of Work, Even When She’s Sick And Fucking Contagious
“Thank god I was there to help!”
Brave: Denise Just Announced To Her Entire Office That She Didn’t Get a Great Sleep Last Night
“Now that I’m thinking about it, I’m pretty sure I had a nightmare,” Denise bravely shared.
Aww: This Little Girl Wants To Be Interrupted On The Senate Floor When She Grows Up
“Why not set your sights on the explicit and deeply rooted misogyny of the United States government?”