Thoughts ARCHIVES

I LIVED IT: I Got Hit by a Car Because I Was Watching the Tom Holland ‘Umbrella’ Lip-Sync Battle

I LIVED IT: The COVID Vaccine Made Me Text My Ex the Lyrics to ‘Hey Soul Sister’

How I’m Celebrating Black History Month by Reposting My Old Selfies

Why I Stopped Thrifting and Started Grave Robbing

Help! I Made My Husband a Man Cave and Now He Won’t Shut the Fuck Up About Stalagmites

Why I Wait Until Right Before I’m About to Dig in the Mud to Paint My Nails

I’m Not Racist, I Just Only Interact With POC When I’m Underpaying Them to Do Something

I LIVED IT: One Pube Got Stuck to My Vibrator and It Looked Exactly Like Charlie Brown

I Finally Gave My Mom Grandkids and Now I’m Wanted for Kidnapping

I LIVED IT: The Bill Came

Why I Moved Back to My Hometown to Seem More Edgy by Comparison

I LIVED IT: I Slapped a Stranger’s Child but No One Made a TV Show About It

I LIVED IT: The Person I Don’t Want to Date Doesn’t Want to Date Me

Why I’ve Outsourced My Sexts to ChatGPT

Why I Think We’re Not Sexualizing Mrs. Claus Enough

Why I Got My Buccal Fat Removed So I Could Store More Acorns in My Cheeks

How I’m Doing the Work to Understand My Privilege as a Taylor Swift Concert Ticket Holder

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