DUDE CORNER: Why I Stopped Admitting Fault and Started Screaming ‘Agree to Disagree’

Dude Corner

Wassup, my dudes! Back to share an epic freaking hack for denying accountability: So, recently, I have been getting into a lot of back and forth with people, women, dogs, children, and large animals who seem to think they’re better than me. Sure, sometimes I might be in the wrong, but I never have to admit it with this little trick. If someone is making you feel bad about an alleged mistake you made, just throw your hands up and shout out, “Agree to disagree!”


The trick is to just keep yelling until the other person realizes how fair and balanced you are for saying it. You really want to emotionally wear them out until they just give up, making you the undisputed winner of every argument. 


I initially started screaming, “Agree to disagree!” just to save myself time and make all my disagreements end 20% faster. This is perfect if you’re trying to convince your childhood friend that you were not high at her grandma’s funeral, even though it would’ve been fine if you were because funerals are boring and suck. Or, let’s say your mom asks you if you stole 30 bucks out of her purse. Don’t let her guilt you into thinking you’re wrong for taking it! NO BRO! Agree to disagree! It’s not your fault you needed that 30 bucks to sign up for Tinder premium. This is what I think I would have learned to do in therapy.



By saying you agree to disagree, you are showing that you want to be on the same page with someone, without actually having to be on the same page. You might be thinking, “YO bro wouldn’t it save you like so much time and be overall beneficial for your relationships to admit you were in the wrong?” Well, if I apologized, I would look like a b-word, a p-word, a baby, and a punk. So, no, I won’t admit fault, I just agree to disagree. 


It actually helps me sleep at night to think of all the accountability I’ve side-stepped, the embarrassment I’ve dodged, and the people in my life who have been strong-armed into agreeing that we are going to disagree. So you’re welcome for this totally foolproof life hack, my dudes!