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Thoughts ARCHIVES
I Want JLaw to Be My Best Friend Except Uglier Than Me and Not Famous
I Removed a Thorn From a Lesbian’s Paw; Now We Are Best Friends
Top 10 Times I Lost 5 Pounds in 2015
I Couldn’t Open His Button-Fly in Time
We’re Not a Cult, We’re Just Adult Coloring Book People
All My Friends Died in a Boating Accident and I Wasn’t Even Invited
I Cut Sugar for Just Two Weeks and My Husband Left Me
I Went on an All-Eggnog Cleanse for 10 Days and Gained 47 Pounds
I Do All of My Best Creative Work Responding To Tinder Messages
4 Ways Adele Cured My Eczema
My Ex-Boyfriend Got Engaged on a Sleigh Ride and I’m Totally Fine
My Mother Put Me in the Friend Zone
It’s So Embarrassing I Still Fit in This Dress From Junior High!
I Developed The Ability to Talk to Animals But They Just Keep Asking Me to Buy Them Vape Pens
My Husband Didn’t Handcraft Any of Our Furniture But We Still Make it Work
I Made My Friends Sync to My Cycle So I’m The Alpha
I’m Dating Another Joel
I Love Pizza, Which Is Adorable Because I’m Hot
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