Thoughts ARCHIVES

How I Get It Done: I Simply Don’t

Why I’m Taking a Gap Year to Live in a Lair Beneath This Opera House

I Asked Someone to Watch My Stuff, And When I Came Out of the Bathroom, The Whole Coffee Shop Was Applauding My Jacket

Why I’m Refusing To Apologize For Eating The Plums That Were In The Icebox

5 Times My Tall Husband Joseph Insisted On Cooking Beef

Material Success Doesn’t Bring Happiness. Here’s Why I’m Still Willing to Give it a Shot

4 Reasons Why I Shouldn’t Have To Step Aside And Let This Kid Have A Turn On The Big Bass Wheel At Dave And Busters

Move Over, ‘Cottagecore’: Here’s Why I Fantasize About Living In An Old Mine Shaft

Why I Don’t Go to Therapy and Just Watch Frasier Re-Runs Instead

Why I’m Staying at Home Unless You Have a Boat

How I Sleep At Night Knowing My Boyfriend Has A Bigger Ass Than Me

Should We Train Lobsters to be Waiters So We Can Keep Going to Applebee’s?

DUDE CORNER: I Just Think Cancel Culture Veers Into Dangerous Territory, Like for Me Personally

DUDE CORNER: Why I Will Always Believe Women When Doing So Has No Negative Consequences for Me Personally

Wait – Are The Million K-Pop Fans Who RSVPed Not Actually Coming to my Birthday Party?

I LIVED IT: I Put Babyfeet on My Hands. Now I Have Tiny Widdle Baby Hands

I’m a Method Actor and My Method is Being Rude to the Cast and Crew

We Don’t Need Statues To Learn About History. That’s What ‘Night At The Museum’ Is For.

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