Living
You need to add a little life to your face, because you know that young, catty toddler is going to call you out.
So you finally got asked out by the hot neighbor guy, and it only took two days of nude sunbathing on your deck.
Get his attention while you stay home to read this stunning feat of American poetry.
What’s more flawless than a shiny new doorknob?
Make an effort not to actively offend people.