So he hasn’t texted you yet. That’s fine! Everyone knows the battery life on iPhones is really shitty for everyone, even the new ones. You basically have to carry a charger with you every day! So maybe he forgot his and that’s why it’s been radio silence for the last 20 hours. Take this quiz to figure out if his phone died, or… I mean that’s really the only thing that could have happened. Anyway, take this quiz:
Does he have a phone?
A) Yes, I know that because he’s texted me in the past.
B) Yes, but I just don’t know if it’s charged and I’m thinking maybe it died… or….
Has he posted to social media?
A) Yes, he’s posted like five tweets.
B) Yes, but you can actually access Twitter from a desktop so it’s very possible his phone died. Unless…
Does he have iMessage on his computer?
A) Not sure.
B) Yes, he does, but it’s weird to text from your computer so I would understand if he was waiting for his phone to charge before texting me. That’s what I would do. I mean there is a world where… No, nevermind. That’s a crazy thought.
Has he let his phone die before?
A) I don’t know. Probably?
B) Yeah, this is veryyyyy typical of him. I mean, I don’t really know that, but he must let his phone die all the time. Of course, there’s always another truth, which is harder to accept but… No, his phone is for sure dead.
Do you think he’s into you?
A) Hard to tell.
B) Ha! That’s funny! Of course he’s into me, I’m amazing. I swear it’s probably just that his phone is dead. Or… Do you think… No… It can’t be… Why… But I’m… Maybe I should buy him a new phone with better battery life?
Mostly As: It sounds like we’re not quite sure what is happening here! His phone could be dead, or maybe he’s just not that into you. Honestly, this is no skin off your back. Who needs a dude who is unable to communicate like an adult!
Mostly Bs: His phone is dead, girlfriend! Don’t you worry! The moment that thing is charged he will send you a sweet text, cause that’s what’s happening here! Unless it’s not and he could care fuckin’ less and his phone is actually at like 60%! Ha, no! That can’t be true!…