This is a little embarrassing for me to talk about. My husband and I have been arguing over one issue for ages: Is it cold in the den or no? I never thought I’d find myself saying this, but after careful examination of the facts, it turns out my husband was right. It is not cold in the den.
I’ve been arguing for at least five years that yes, it is cold in here, as evidenced by the fact that A) I’m cold; B) I’m wearing a sweater, and C) every time I’m in this room, I would prefer that the reindeer blanket were on me instead of under the dog. Jared, however, has remained very confident in his assessment of the ambient temperature.
He has repeatedly made scientific arguments based on fact to prove that, no, it is not cold in here. The truth is, I can’t argue with the hard evidence staring me in the face: The thermostat that says it’s 72 degrees, and the Encyclopedia Britannica online, for which Jared bought a subscription to specifically to show me that places where the thermometer reads 72 degrees technically fall into a climate zone known as “temperate”. So. I am afraid I have no choice but to admit that Jared is right: It is not, in fact, cold in here.
I was so, so wrong.
Mind you, I’m still cold, but at least now I know that I’m wrong to feel that way; that I can be cold in here without it being cold in here. This pains me to admit, but according to Jared and science, it’s true.
Jared thinks that we choose our own reality, and that if I’d only choose to live in a reality where I’m warm, then I actually would be warm. I guess that’s what I need: the confidence to internalize the truth that despite the fact that I’m cold, it’s really not cold in here. It’s a self-esteem problem, really. And that’s something that I’ve struggled with my whole life: having enough confidence to believe that my direct experience is wrong.
I can admit when I’m wrong. And Jared can admit when I’m wrong, too. That’s what it takes to make a relationship last.
Oh, I’m not wrapping this blanket around me because I’m cold. I’m actually just doing it because I like the way it feels. I’m a rationalist now. And as a rationalist, I can say for a fact that it’s not cold in here. Thank you, Jared. I love you, baby.