How to Show George W. Bush The Forgiveness You Can’t Muster for Your Father

In the many years since Hurricane Katrina and the Iraq War, George W. Bush has been trying to redeem himself. Since you weren’t directly impacted by those events, you’re really starting to come around to him – unlike your father, Rick, who you will never, ever forgive for what he did. Here’s how to show the nation’s second-worst president the forgiveness you just cannot muster for own father, the man who has caused you unspeakable pain for decades.

 

Buy the book of his paintings.

Since all proceeds go to helping veterans transition back to civilian life, this is about allowing our former president to do his best to make up for the damage that he himself directly caused. But more than that, buying the book shows Bush that you know he’s at least trying to make amends, unlike your father, who still won’t admit forcing you to drive to upstate New York to spend eight hours at the Baseball Hall of Fame was selfish and cruel.

 

Set his self-portrait as your phone lock screen.

Putting that weird painting of Bush’s feet in the bathtub on your home screen is a great reminder to you that he is a flawed but ultimately sensitive man with good intentions, in spite of all the deaths he caused. You can see his redeeming qualities because he’s shown remorse while your father has shown nothing of the sort, even for when he brought a sandwich to your high school graduation and ate it right in the middle of the ceremony as you were giving your Valedictorian speech. He has never apologized, and it still stings, no matter how much Mom has tried to tell you “That’s just how he is, honey.”

 

 

Remind friends, “At least he wasn’t as bad as Trump.”

You’re willing to forgive an unnecessary war with all of its wasteful spending and bloodshed, in light of recent events with Trump. So tell your friends to be thankful for what they had! At least he didn’t show your boyfriend how chubby you were as a kid, causing you both to be late for prom, or how you got your head stuck between the bars of the staircase and “looked like a fat little cow.” While that is also not as bad as Trump, it doesn’t make it any less unforgivable.

 

George W. Bush may not be a great man, but he is a good man, or at least accidentally bad. So show him you’re over his missteps, even though you will never, ever do so for your father, who deserves nothing of the sort.

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