You’re a mom-to-be, and it is your responsibility to maintain an active on-the-go lifestyle that lets others believe pregnancy is easy and fun. But now that you’re nearing your due date, you face the threat of your water breaking at any moment, leaving you far from home with a soaking wet crotch. Uh-oh! Check out these popular adult diaper brands as you coolly resign yourself to the fact that this is just another gross aspect of childbirth that you never really thought about before and will now have to play off like it’s no biggie at all.
Molicare Super Plus Overnight Briefs (1-800-Wheelchair, $54)
This brand is touted as one of the most absorbent out there, which is great because you honestly have no idea how much is going to come gushing out of there, and like so many other aspects reproduction, no one is going to tell you in advance. It’s cool though—you are like, not even that worried about this whole insane thing that’s about to happen to your body. You are glowing! Keep these handy for whenever your body decides to burst open.
Attends Incontinence Care Briefs, Waistband Style (Amazon, $24.19)
These diapers have an absorbent core that’s effective for “light to moderate incontinence,” which is the equivalent of “God-knows-how-much amniotic fluid.” The good news is these puppies are discreet enough to wear under most clothing, so you can slip it on under your maxi dress and maybe stay another half-hour at that barbecue while you pretend to be one of those chill pregnant woman who is cool with sipping on a late-pregnancy, doctor-approved glass of wine and isn’t at all worried about experiencing the crushing pain of childbirth without painkillers. None of this is awkward or embarrassing or painful! It is cool to have a diaper in your bag for you, too!
Tranquility TopLiner Booster Pad (North Shore Care, $6.40)
This booster pad “extends the life of a normal diaper” so you don’t have to change it as often. Do you actually need this? You don’t know yet. Your midwife just mentioned offhand the other day that you “might wanna have some adult diapers on hand” in the event that your water breaks, the same way she’s mentioned so many other precautions as though this whole thing is no big deal. So go with the flow and just stuff a couple of these in your purse to show that you’re super down for this very manageable time in your life and not like “WTF is happening?! What have I gotten myself into?”
CVS Women’s Underwear (CVS, $45.96)
What could be more laid-back than running into any old drugstore and grabbing a pack of generic adult diapers that call themselves underwear? These are touted “for an active lifestyle” and since you are about to go into active labor, why not keep a pair handy in your purse so you can look a little less of a mess as you ride your own chill vibe over to the hospital for a fun 17-hour push-sesh? The human body is a miracle and you feel no shame!
Pregnancy is a great time to be thankful for the wonders of being a woman while also wearing a diaper before, during, and after labor just in case, because nobody really explained to you how much stuff was gonna come out of you. Good luck, Mama!!