Thoughts ARCHIVES

I Don’t Have Daddy Issues Daddy, I Mean Steve

I’m Totally Out of Feelings to Talk About, But I Know Drywall

I Quit My Job And Moved To An Island and Now I Have Sand Fleas

I Defunded My Own Birth Control Pills to Buy Candy Corn. Here’s Why.

There Were No Strippers at My Bachelorette Party Even Though I Said ‘No Strippers’

Virginity Is a Construct, Not That I’m a Virgin (Ew)

I Have a Great Face for Wigs

Sorry, YouTube: My Cat Prefers the Stage to the Screen

It’s Time to End the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Because I Just Learned About It

Is It Okay to Return to That Cheap Nail Place Now That Conditions Have Presumably Improved?

I Own Two Anthropologie Sweaters and You Will Treat Me As Such

Anal Sex: Won’t It Hurt To Fit A Whole Butt In My Pussy?

Don’t Talk to Me Until I’ve Had My Morning Dread-Filled Stare At The Ceiling

How Fighting Those Chainsaw-Wielding Psychopaths Saved My Toxic Marriage

7 Reasons Why You NEED to Help Me Get This Poem to Channing Tatum

All the Good Men Are Gay, Taken, Or Don’t Have A Sturdy Enough Dick

Should I Have Kids or Just Poop All Over My House Myself?

I Don’t Have White Fragility, Okay? Get Off My Back!

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