Thoughts ARCHIVES

I LIVED IT: Someone Left the Party When I Was Planning My Exit and I Had to Stay Another 20 Minutes

How I Finally Cut Down My Screen Time by Getting Really Into God

I LIVED IT: I Had to Wear Sunglasses Even Though My Eyes Are My Best Feature

I LIVED IT: My Hot Rodent Boyfriend Dumped Me for Some Cheese

I LIVED IT: I Had to Wear Underwear Other Than the Two Pairs I Like

I LIVED IT: I Asked How Blue My Tongue Was After Having a Popsicle and Got Told ‘Not That Blue’

Why I Always Blend Makeup With My Ring Finger Before Using My Whole Hand to Rub My Eye

I LIVED IT: I Had to Wear a Real Bra

I LIVED IT: Someone Asked Me What I Do for a Living

I LIVED IT: Nobody Matched My Freak

I LIVED IT: It Was Too Hot to Install My A/C

Why I Stopped Using Dating Apps and Started Dating My Daughter’s Childhood Celebrity Crushes

I LIVED IT: Mean Person From High School Still Hot

Why I Refuse to Go Home With a Guy Unless He Impresses Me With His Iridescent Breeding Plumage

I LIVED IT: My Gynecologist Made a Face

I LIVED IT: The Boots Were Not Actually Waterproof

Why I’m Going on a Silent Retreat After Realizing How Much I Talked at the Hang Last Night

Why Everyone Else’s Cough Is Gross but Mine Is Actually No Big Deal Don’t Worry

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