San Antonio resident Dominique Garnier has broken a national record under the category of amount of time spent rummaging through a handbag. The mother of two has been hunched over her LeSportsac tote for six days straight, and she isn’t showing any sign of stopping.
Talk about dedication!
The marathon fossicking session began six days ago, when Garnier’s daughter casually mentioned that her lips were a little dry. While Garnier was able to fish out her second-best chapstick for her daughter, the “really good one without all those chemicals” has remained elusive in the murky depths of her purse.
Garnier’s daughter Tricia was perfectly willing to settle for the lesser, chemical-infused chapstick, and has long since moved on with her life. However, after all this time, Garnier remains confident that the superior lip balm is in her bag, somewhere.
When asked to comment, Garnier said, “No, I’ll find it, it will just be a minute. You go ahead without me.”
Sources close to the situation confirm that this is not the first time Garnier has spent an inordinate amount of time with her arms submerged in her purse. Garnier has been known to spend hours on end looking for her car keys, a pen, or even a movie ticket she was able to lose in the span of time between buying it and presenting it to the ticket taker.
The sheer amount of time that Garnier has devoted to endlessly searching through her tote has proven a source of frustration for her friends and family.
“I bought her a bag with a ton of pockets so she could keep everything organized,” Tricia explained. “But I only made it worse by increasing the amount of potential hiding places. What was I thinking?”
Previous US record-holders include Sarah H. of Portland, OR, who spent five days searching for a stray tic-tac that she felt confident was “pretty clean” and Samina N. of Boston, who spent so long looking for a tampon that her period was over by the time she found it.
At press time, the contents of Garnier’s purse included two books, one Kindle, three lipsticks, two mascaras, four varieties of sunscreen (all SPF 50 and above), nine packs of gum, a baby bottle (her children are 16 and 18), a loose tissue, infinite napkins, and a granola bar for if anyone’s feeling hungry. No chapstick was found.