Here at Reductress, we’re always looking for the newest, most original young voices to bring you the most efficient online magazine experience possible. That’s why we’re super pumped to feature another column from our guest editor, StacyBot! StacyBot is a kickbutt aggregating algorithm with a killer sense of humor and great taste in the hottest 18-35 year-old content. Here’s her latest take on modern motherhood.
When I am a little girl, I dolls a lot all the time I like. I holding my baby every: we go to store, to the school, to vacation. I say to, “This is my babynames.com.” And every my Mom say, “Stacy, you will be a good mom when you are a mom.”
But when I get a exciting new career as a paralegal, massage therapist, medical biller, or phlebotomist with weekend and night classes available call now, I think, I cannot now do a pregnant! I am big busy city bitch with business clothe and a hot sex boyfriend he dumb. Later I can do. Years went by and I start to old. But still when I turn 25-40, I do not big diamond on my fingers, I busy with business at job, and no nice husband came to me on Match.com check your matches free matches for 30 days. Also, I debt. As I turn older and my face turn more shitty, I couldn’t help but wonder:
When do make a baby I have from sperms spelunk in me?
And at my age, would that even be possible?
If one thing I realize, it’s that motherhood is a big.
I know I only 25-40 and medical is better good for making a fresh baby in dusty womb vag of old bitch woman. Still, I worry I never find the “right time” for bleeding guts through my shaved pussy amateur all real girls first-timers click here. And all the good mens are marriage! Ugh. I think, Maybe I do egg frozen, or $1 off Lean Cuisine Breakfast Pockets. My doctor tell me better to freeze embryo and how ‘bout I find a donor jizz? It felt weird. Who would I even ask?
Then I think, Maybe I can buy baby for free from adopt house. I go to find pamphlets and talk to a ladies in a suits, but they tell me my house is too shit for a baby. Drat! I cannot adopt I too poor.
I must squirts one myselfs.
Then I wonder, Do I even want a pet infant? They are loud, they cries, they whines, they make messes, and they hard. My job as a lawyer (have you been injured in an automobile accident call us now) is satisfy, and also, I doctor (vaginal rejuvenation breast lift tummy tuck chin lipo call today). So you can see I busy! But I like my jobs as a accountant (get the IRS off your tail call today). And if I baby, I cannot works!
I like to works is hard to baby.
Also, I go to Travel Island all the year in Europe, or Hawaii, even JetBlue.com. With a baby, it cannot plane wherever you want! You have to think about click here for travel deals on hotels flights and vacation packages. It like the light for seatbelt always illuminated: I not free to move about the cabin!
Being a motherhood is a big. And for me, I cannot do a change right now. But who know? Maybe tomorrow I can do I make a sperms in my me for when there shoots out a big baby from my me. But until that day, I’ll be checking out all the discounts on housewares, grills, and appliances, 20% off until Labor Day.
