My Version of Feminism Includes Eye Lifts

White Woman Speaks:

Hell yes, I’m a feminist. We women are just as smart and capable as any man. We should have equal rights, equal pay, and equal opportunities. I don’t even care if my beliefs make people call me a radical feminist; there’s nothing wrong with that! I would just like to make it clear that my version of feminism includes eye lifts.

 

As women, we have to learn to love and respect our bodies. There are constant messages being sent through the media that we have to be thinner, younger, and more beautiful, and that’s bullshit! We’re beautiful just as we are. We should celebrate our bodies. But if your version of celebrating your body includes having a surgeon trim off the saggy skin above your eyes, I am not going to judge you or tell you that you’ve betrayed feminism. Nuh uh, sister! My body, my eye lift! Get your rosaries off my eyeballs!

 

In The Feminine Mystique, Betty Friedan didn’t say a word about eye lifts in her list of societal factors that make women unhappy. Not a word! Eve Ensler doesn’t talk about them in The Vagina Monologues – hello, your eyes are nowhere near your vagina! And Susan Faludi couldn’t be less concerned about them in Backlash: The Undeclared War Against Women. And if eye lifts are A-Okay with these great thinkers, I’m not going to argue against them! Nora Ephron hated her neck, but never mentioned her eye skin. Where’s the harm in a little out-of-pocket corrective surgery?

 

 

Hell, you might even feel more prepared to fight the patriarchy after getting an eye lift. It’s possible that getting your eyes done will make you look more awake, and then you’ll feel more awake to then injustices of the world. If you can’t stay woke, you can at least look woke. Why is this bad for feminism, exactly?

 

Let’s be real here. Feminism doesn’t live in the delicate skin around your eyes. Cutting off that extra flesh isn’t going to slice away your desire for social justice. Social justice lives in your heart; the only thing that lives in your eye bags is fat and blood. So if it makes you feel better about yourself to get an eye lift, then do it. I won’t cast judgment on whether it makes you look better or worse, but I’ll say right now, it’s not going to make you look anti-feminist in my eyes.

 

We can still fight for our rights even after having a little work done on the peepers. Do you think getting an eye lift would stop Malala from fighting the Taliban? Heck no! I do think she would benefit from an eye lift, but that is entirely her choice.

 

So if you feel like getting an eye lift, I won’t judge you, and if I get one, don’t judge me. We have to stand together as sisters and support each other, and sometimes to do that we’ve got to get rid of the sags, bags and wrinkles around our eyes. My version of feminism loves that in particular.

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