One-Shoulder Tops That Accentuate Your Pretty Arm and Shame The Ugly One

Love and Sex

How to Tell Your Boyfriend of 5 Years That You Don’t Know His Name

“What do you want for dinner tonight and also by the way what is your name?”

Living

6 Summer Cocktails Your Boyfriend Will Say The Same Old Condescending Shit About

“Does this even have alcohol in it?”

Love and Sex

How To Embrace Your Unique Beauty After Realizing Your Guy Exclusively Dates Women Who Look Like You

Clearly there’s something in you he appreciates — to the point of fetishization!

News

New Dating App Allows Your Mom to Set You Up with Young Men Who Seem Nice

The app also features hourly “just get back out there” alerts.

Entertainment

5 Celebs We Photoshopped Without Front Teeth Who Look Different But Amazing

Bye, bye teeth – hello sexy!

Thoughts

It Takes Me a While to Open Up, But It’s Worth It So You Can Steal the Pearl I Grew

Doesn’t that seem worthwhile?

Thoughts

I Said ‘Yes’ To Everything For A Week And This Guy Ate My Feet

As they say, you live and you learn!

Style

Summer Caftans For Hiding The Fact That You’re Pregnant In The Front And The Back

So you want to look fly this summer, but you’re super pregnant!

Style

How to Get Beachy Waves Without Having to Fuck the Ocean

Friends will see your flowy, beachy tresses and ask, “So did the ocean ever text you back?”

Living

QUIZ: Should You Pretend You Know the Lyrics to the Song, Or Leave the Country?

Before you start mouthing random words under your breath, consider leaving the country.

News

Man Spends More Time Staging Dick Pic Than Considering If Woman Wants to See It

“I think she probably liked the picture a lot,” says Jones.

News

Woman Becomes Only Black Friend To 100th White Person

“I’ve always wanted a black friend,” said Heather Fellows, Fordham’s Pilates instructor and white friend #86.

Thoughts

I Wanted a More Natural Look. Here’s Why I Became Bean Sprouts

I don’t need to wear makeup anymore since I’ve discovered I’m my most beautiful when I’m plants.

Love and Sex

How to Introduce Sex Toys Without Turning It Into a Funeral For His Dick

No matter what you do, don’t whisper “R.I.P” to his penis.

Living

The 4 Best Cat Cafés For You to Experience Even More Rejection By Cats

This café even offers vegan treats for those who wish to stress eat muesli while being shunned by several kittens.

Style

Bold Lipsticks To Save For A Hypothetical Special Occasion That Will Never Happen

Here are a few bold lipsticks that you’ll keep indefinitely because you’ll never actually find an occasion to wear them!

News

Man in Male-Dominated Field Says Being a Woman is Actually an Advantage

“That can’t be right,” said Campos. “I’d hire a woman if I could. They just aren’t as interested in engineering as men are.”

Thoughts

I Don’t Wear Sunscreen So I Can Get Perfectly Millennial Pink Skin

I embodied the very nature of being part of this generation by turning my skin into the palette of a Wes Anderson film.

Style

High-Waisted Shorts Your Ass Will Pour Out of Like Sand

“Whoa,” your friends will say, as they try to catch your butt in their hands.

Thoughts

Women Are Always So Jealous of Me Because I Poop Really Fast

I’m more than my digestive efficiency! I do have flaws like other women!

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RECENT POSTS

One-Shoulder Tops That Accentuate Your Pretty Arm and Shame The Ugly One

How to Tell Your Boyfriend of 5 Years That You Don’t Know His Name

6 Summer Cocktails Your Boyfriend Will Say The Same Old Condescending Shit About

How To Embrace Your Unique Beauty After Realizing Your Guy Exclusively Dates Women Who Look Like You

New Dating App Allows Your Mom to Set You Up with Young Men Who Seem Nice

5 Celebs We Photoshopped Without Front Teeth Who Look Different But Amazing

It Takes Me a While to Open Up, But It’s Worth It So You Can Steal the Pearl I Grew

I Said ‘Yes’ To Everything For A Week And This Guy Ate My Feet

Summer Caftans For Hiding The Fact That You’re Pregnant In The Front And The Back

How to Get Beachy Waves Without Having to Fuck the Ocean

QUIZ: Should You Pretend You Know the Lyrics to the Song, Or Leave the Country?

Man Spends More Time Staging Dick Pic Than Considering If Woman Wants to See It

Woman Becomes Only Black Friend To 100th White Person

I Wanted a More Natural Look. Here’s Why I Became Bean Sprouts

How to Introduce Sex Toys Without Turning It Into a Funeral For His Dick

The 4 Best Cat Cafés For You to Experience Even More Rejection By Cats

Bold Lipsticks To Save For A Hypothetical Special Occasion That Will Never Happen

Man in Male-Dominated Field Says Being a Woman is Actually an Advantage

I Don’t Wear Sunscreen So I Can Get Perfectly Millennial Pink Skin

High-Waisted Shorts Your Ass Will Pour Out of Like Sand

Women Are Always So Jealous of Me Because I Poop Really Fast