I Wanted a More Natural Look. Here’s Why I Became Bean Sprouts

While I love a dramatic smokey eye or a bold red lip, putting on makeup every day has become a routine that’s gotten old for me. I don’t want to look like I’m trying this hard all the time. In fact, I want a look completely free of any type of artificial products at all – a look that says, “No part of me has been made up in any way.” I wanted the most natural look of all, and that’s why I became bean sprouts.


When I go out into the world, I don’t look like I’m trying so hard anymore because I’m actually just a pile of bean sprouts.


Bean sprouts are the ultimate natural look, because they’re plants that grow from the ground, they’re healthy and they say, “Someone might make pho with me later! Or eat me raw at an overpriced hotel in the woods.” That’s the kind of aesthetic I’m going for now, and I’ve achieved it by hopping onto my countertop and just becoming a pile of bean sprouts.



I don’t need to wear makeup anymore since I’ve discovered I’m my most beautiful when I’m plants.


Even my boyfriend loves this look more than my made-up ones. He says he appreciates a woman with the confidence to be a pile of beans, and that being makeup-free is actually a sexier look, because it’s a sign that a woman is comfortable with herself as what she truly is: a cluster of vegetables. Turns out he’s also always had a sexual thing for beans and he never knew it. So, there’s that!


Though that may be a man’s opinion, I actually have to agree. Any woman who feels like she can’t still own a room even though she’s not a person anymore because she turned into bean sprouts should probably work on her self-love.


I don’t mean to sound holier-than-thou here. I’ve just learned so much about inner beauty since I’ve stopped putting so much work into my physical appearance and have just let myself slide naturally into a less-maintained look where I’m bean sprouts. It’s a much healthier look anyway. My skin is smooth and a bean, my blemishes are gone and more beans, and my smile is also beans.


When I own this look with confidence, people can’t help but admire me.


Another big benefit of going au beans naturel is that people perceive you as more likable, because bare faces are more trustworthy and also beans can’t lie to you. Being bean sprouts says, “Here I am, world! Accept me the way I am – beans.”


When you have that kind of unashamed attitude about yourself, people can’t help but approach you, because a low-maintenance woman is a confident bean.