It’s 2017 and women are still making an average of 79 cents to every dollar a man makes! That is absolutely ludicrous, which is why I’ve decided to go on strike until women have equal pay! And, sure, if it also happens to bring back beloved 90s snack Dunkaroos, then so be it.
Until equal pay is achieved, I will not be going to work. Instead I’ll be standing outside my office holding signs that says things like “the wage gap is not a myth!” and “equal pay now!” and “omg remember Dunkaroos?” If more women strike and raise their voices, then I believe our country will be forced to listen and begin to close the wage gap. And of course if the company behind Dunkaroos, the individually packed vanilla cookies and frosting, sees my Dunkaroos sign and decides to bring them back, then okay.
To be clear, Dunkaroos still exist. They make them in Canada and you can buy them online. They’re just not readily available. Sort of like how even though women make less on average than men, money does exist and we are paid. But we want more money. And we want more Dunkaroos. If I can get us both, I mean, cool.
I am making a difference in the world.
Every day I’m not working, I’m sending emails to my senators, demanding they be held accountable in the fight for women’s rights. I also casually ask, “Hey, do you know why Dunkaroos aren’t being manufactured in the states anymore? Is this like a government thing?” It can’t hurt to ask.
I guess what I’m saying is, if I can single handedly get equal pay for women by refusing to go to work while also bringing back the most incredible food in human history then ya know what? Sure.