Wait What? I Wasn’t Listening.

White Woman Speaks:

You what? I’m sorry, in what context? Can we just dial it back like two-and-a-half minutes, I just want to make sure I understand the end of your story so please repeat everything you’ve said before the getting-in-the-car part.


Better yet, could you tell me everything you’ve said since you got here? What have you been up to? I don’t think I got all the background info. I really want to make sure I’m getting the story with every degree of authenticity it originally included.


I’m sorry I missed that last part as well as the beginning and most of the middle – I just really thought I could watch a movie and listen to your breakup story at the same time, but I guess I can’t. Ugh, wow I’m so embarrassed. I’ve totally embodied the stereotype of our generation. What does this say about us? More importantly, what does this say about me? Oh sorry you started again. Sorry, I got distracted there. Start over.



I can’t believe I missed it. It’s not anyone’s fault that you told a story at such an inopportune time. It’s okay. Really it’s okay. Don’t worry.


Oh I think I understand everything now. Thank you for recounting. I’m really proud of you and everything you’ve been through. You’re so strong. Wait that part was about you or your sister? Go back.


Wait wait wait wait. WHAT? I’m going to have to rewind this movie. Ugh I really thought I could stay focused on both things that time, but I guess not. You were talking over it and I only caught the punch line! How am I to understand it without the set-up?! Ugh. No, no sorry. Please continue your story. I’m just gonna put this on mute and read their lips while you talk.