How to Get Him as Hard as a Box of Domino Brown Sugar

If you’ve ever reopened a box of Domino brown sugar, you’ve probably noticed that it’s always as hard as a brick, and you’ve also probably wondered if you could get your man to be the same way. Luckily for you, we’ve compiled these tips to spice up your love life and get your BF’s dick as rock-hard as a box of Domino’s brown premium cane sugar when it’s been left open for a month. Yum!

 

Tell him you’re making coffee cake, and that you really need him in order to make it.

Men love to feel needed, and yes, even in the kitchen! That’s why telling him that you’re making coffee cake and that you need him for the recipe will make him super-duper horny. And no, you’re not actually going to crumble his dick on top of your freshly baked dessert, but he doesn’t need to know that just yet.

 

Keep him in your cupboard for five months straight.

Take a page out of your box of brown sugar’s book by leaving your man in the cupboard for five uninterrupted months! Nothing will get him compressed and packed down like wedging him in next to your boxes of cereal and bags of stale chips. Not only will he be hard from all the time being stashed away, but he’ll also be turned on by seeing the sunlight for the first time in months!

 

 

 

Shake him up and bang him on the counter.

Trying to forcefully shake and bang your bag of brown Domino sugar against the countertop does nothing to make It less hard, so by this logic, these activities should also keep your man rock solid. If you’ve gotten him hard with these first two steps, then it might be time to take things to the next level by giving him a good shake, then, if he’s into it, banging him on the counter. This could mean banging like sex or, if he’s into impact play, it could just mean banging. We’ll leave that to you!

 

So if you’ve been wanting to make a man as hard and indestructible as a box of Domino brown sugar, you’ve come to the right place. If he struggles with softening up, just put him in the microwave with a few drops of water and he’ll be just fine. Just follow the steps above and you’ll be mistakenly trying to put his dick in a pineapple upside down cake. Enjoy!