Have you ever wondered what could be made possible by achieving total quiet of the mind? I’ll be honest: when I first started my journey with mindfulness meditation, I was tired, anxious, and cranky all the time. My brain was a cluttered mess. I couldn’t sit still for 30 seconds without making endless to-do lists in my productivity app, checking social media on my phone, or texting. How was I going to sit still for ten whole minutes with the very thoughts I was so desperate to avoid? Let’s just say I’m glad I pushed through, because what I discovered about myself was beyond what I ever thought was possible.
With just one session of mindfulness meditation, I discovered that my phone was dead and I left my charger at home.
It started off easier than I thought: When I began to breathe deeply through my nose, the scattered mess of my daily thoughts began to fade away and I was filled with insight. The discoveries were small at first: “Tomorrow is garbage day,” I noticed. “Don’t forget to take out the trash!” And the noticings just kept coming. From there, I began to imagine myself floating atop a calm, trickling river through a valley of serenity, which led me to the powerful realization that I still hadn’t found a dog walker for when I’m away on spring break, which reminded me that I needed to confirm my waxing appointment, and then it dawned on me that I hadn’t checked my bank statement in a while and I should probably slow down my spending so I can even afford spring break in the first place. It was as if I was transforming into a more tranquil me right before my eyes!
The transformation didn’t stop there. Mindfulness allowed me to feel the space between my breaths AND the space between my last text exchange with Eric. Why hadn’t he messaged me back? My last text totally deserved a “LOL” or at LEAST a “haha”. I began to really see how my attachments were impacting me. Could I be that dependent on my phone, that out of control of my own mind and body?
I thought about reaching for my phone. Something in the back of my head said, “No, you can’t do that right now,” but I didn’t know the reason why. I figured it was my desire for wellness trying to keep my meditation plan on track. I kept breathing, and then it came to me: I definitely left my phone charger at home and my phone is going to die. Wow. My mind and body held the answers within me that I was unable to see in plain sight. I hadn’t charged my phone overnight because I heard that it burns your battery faster if you overcharge it and I had spent all morning on Hinge, so yeah, my battery was probably REALLY low!
This stillness was letting me see things for what they truly were instead of believing a made-up story spun by my ego. The pathway was clear, I just needed to find an outlet to charge my phone and soon I would be in complete control of my own thoughts.
Before I knew it, I was deliberately moving toward the door of my yoga studio, phone in hand, en route to the bodega on the corner where I purchased a $12 charger from a nice young man who said it “should work”.
Next thing I knew, my phone was plugged in, red low battery light turned to bright green bar, total selflessness yet complete self-awareness achieved. I marveled at my newly discovered internal fortitude as I took my final cleansing breaths. Ahhhhh, a text from Eric! “Lol!”, he said! Lol, indeed.
I haven’t meditated since then, but I will say this: I remembered to bring my charger on spring break. Ommmm!
