In a masterful feat of precision timing, 28-year-old MBA student Joanna Evans was typing away at her Organizational Behavior paper late Wednesday evening when the dreaded pop-up notification appeared on her laptop screen—‘Forced Logout For Mandatory Install’. After delaying her MacOS Mojave software update the maximum number of times, Joanna found herself suddenly unable to use her computer. Given an estimated install time of 18 minutes, there was “no choice”, she said, but to use that time to absolutely go to town on herself.
“Without access to my laptop, I didn’t really have other options,” Joanna explained. “I couldn’t do my other work. My laundry was already in the dryer. 18 minutes isn’t enough time to meal prep, but it’s just about enough time to give myself a thorough bean-flicking.”
With her paper due the next day, though, she didn’t want to waste any extra time jiggling her bits. Said Joanna, “I was going to have to get the timing just right.”
Joanna pulled out her trusty Jimmy Jane vibrator from her nightstand and got straight to work, seamlessly transitioning from furious typing to furious self-pleasuring.
It wasn’t all smooth sailing, though. Joanna recalled, “about halfway through my fantasy of the hot Trader Joe’s clerk bending me over the frozen food bins, I glanced over at my computer and saw that the update only had an estimated 3 minutes remaining. That’s when I knew I had to turn it up a notch—literally.”
In a real nail-biter of a finale, Joanna turned up her Jimmy Jane’s speed up to 11, and, moments later, orgasmed simultaneously with the booting up of MacOS Mojave version 10.14.6. “It was satisfying on many levels,” she recalled. “I came with just seconds left before I was prompted to enter my password.”
Looks like Joanna can add time management skills AND technical proficiency to her resume!
