A new report out of San Diego, CA, confirms that 27-year-old Dina Nare would have awesome thoughts if she were comfortable with even one single minute of boredom, but sadly this is not the case, so her thoughts are pretty lackluster.
“I would say I’m doing something every single second of every day, but not necessarily something I enjoy,” Dina told reporters gathered at the scene. “I don’t love to be left alone with my thoughts. Why would I intentionally opt for boredom? Boredom sucks.”
According to scientists, boredom is responsible for almost every invention, song, novel, and miscellaneous discovery known to man, but Dina doesn’t want to participate.
“My thoughts kind of suck,” she continued, “They’re just nothing special, so I might as well eliminate them, you know?”
Dina told reporters she listens to podcasts on walks, music in the shower, scrolls on Instagram on the bus, Twitter on the subway, and adds YouTube to the rotation whenever the other stuff is getting a little tiresome.
Meanwhile, psychological researchers believe if Dina were comfortable with being by her lonesome for even a single minute, her quality of life would greatly improve.
“When we give ourselves time to think, that’s actually when ideas happen!” researcher Harley Parker told reporters. “Once you get past that first minute of boredom, beautiful things occur. Your imagination gets going, and bam! Your thoughts get awesome.”
When asked whether she would be comfortable giving this a try, Dina said, “Of course!” About 30 seconds into the minute, however, she pulled out her phone. When reporters asked why she gave up, Dina said, “Oh, shit! I forgot we were doing that experiment thing! Do you guys want to see a dog flip into a lake?”
After watching the video for research purposes, reporters concluded Dina was not ready to embrace boredom in her daily life, even though it would change everything for her.
“Being bored was a huge part of my childhood, for sure,” Dina continued. “It would always lead to fun shenanigans and creative solutions to break up the monotony. But now, if I’m bored for even 15 seconds, I start to get the shakes.”
As of press time, Dina had lost cell service for two minutes while taking the train underground. This brief period of boredom sparked the only idea she’s ever had: a GoPro specifically designed for flipping dogs.
