In a story emerging out of San Francisco, CA, 24-year-old Quincy Barnard has finally given up on trying to properly receive a compliment and has instead just started throwing punches.
“I never know what to say when someone tells me I look nice or that they really like something about me,” she told reporters gathered at the scene from a safe distance. “So yesterday, when a guy I like complimented my jeans, I just got so flustered that I did the only thing I could think of: I started absolutely wailing on him.”
Rather than say, “Thanks!” and explain where she got them like a normal person, Quincy instead squared up, closed her eyes, and started swinging wildly.
“I think it was just an instinct thing?” she continued. “I don’t know! I’m scared!”
“I’ll admit I was surprised by it all,” Quincy’s crush, Miles McGowan, told reporters while nursing a black eye and bloody nose. “But then again, I totally get it. Taking a compliment is hard. I should have known better than to surprise her with a kind word like that.”
This is the first time Quincy has reacted this way to receiving a compliment, but she doesn’t expect it to be the last. “I honestly panicked and kind of blacked out when it happened, which I do every time I receive a compliment. That makes me think it’ll definitely happen again.”
“This instinct to react to intense discomfort with violence is jarring, but it’s not uncommon,” said behavioral scientist Mina Gerber. “For some people, receiving a compliment creates a feeling of discomfort in their nervous system akin to being cornered by a wild animal or hit by a car.”
“Yes! That’s exactly what it feels like,” Quincy responded upon hearing this description. “And I’ve been hit by a car before. It’s totally like that.”
To avoid further incidents, Quincy has been warning her close acquaintances not to try any funny business, like telling her she has a sweet smile or that she’s a talented cook.
“I would hate to have to punch them out, too,” she said. “But I will admit, it kind of is the most effective method of breaking the post-compliment tension that I’ve tried.”
As far as her crush goes, Quincy said she hopes she can make amends with Miles and learn how to take his compliments without threatening his physical safety.
“Alternatively, I’ll tell him to start negging me,” she continued. “That’s probably a safer bet, honestly.”
