Healthcare is expensive in the U.S., and on top of that it can be difficult to find the right physician that understands the limits of Western medicine. That’s why I’ve decided to say goodbye to my primary care physician altogether and replace them with one ripe avocado instead.
Readers, I’m never going back!
Avocados are known to be one of the nutritious foods out there, with healthy fats, fiber, and lots of vitamins and minerals. As for my last primary care physician, Dr. Horowitz, I can’t really say the same. The last time I visited her office was to ask for help with my stomach problems and she couldn’t offer much advice except that I should eliminate some stress from my life. Uhhh okay, tell me something I don’t know!
Now that I only go to my avocado for healthcare, I’ve never felt more in control of my wellbeing. Also, I never have long wait times for lab work, because my avocado doesn’t order lab work!
Now that I’m consuming something with a good source of magnesium, B6, vitamin C, vitamin E, and folate, and potassium, I’m pretty confident that I’ll never have any health problems for as long as I live. Thanks a lot big pharma, but I’m gonna stick with the natural approach from now on!
Although I’m happy with my choice to replace my primary care provider with a plant-based superfood, I have received some criticism, or “genuine concern”, from my friends and family. Ever since I started my new healthcare regimen, people have told me that “avocados aren’t even that healthy for you,” and that “you can’t consult them for medical assistance or attention,” or even that “there isn’t a single avocado that has an MD,” but I simply don’t care! Are you seriously going to tell me I’m not perfectly healthy? The avocado certainly hasn’t said a word about it!
No doctor has done more for me than my ever-growing collection of avocados that are taking up all the space in my kitchen. I learned that you really don’t need to go see a doctor, despite what society tells you. Trust me, all it takes is at least one avocado to solve all your problems – which is way less expensive than seeing a medical health professional!
I encourage everyone to try replacing your primary care physician with an avocado for themselves! Just please leave the most ripe ones for me.
