Woman Lists Advil as Primary Care Provider

After a moment of confusion during a recent trip to the CVS Minute Clinic, Taylor Duffy wrote “Advil” in the blank next to “Primary Care Provider” on her intake form.


“At first I didn’t know what to write,” said Duffy, who works three part-time jobs, none of which provide benefits. “But then I just thought about who provides me the most care, and no one takes care of me more than Advil does.”


Duffy’s doctor, who she was seeing about some pretty severe back pain, was confused at the response.


“I was trying to find out what doctor Ms. Duffy sees for this pain since this is just urgent care,” said Dr. Kirschtein. “Who helps her on a more regular basis?”


“I definitely understand why she was confused,” clarified Duffy, who is in pretty constant pain and could benefit from consistent care. “I’m not irresponsible. I don’t just rely on Advil. The generic brand ibuprofen is fine too. Even Tylenol if I really have to.”


Duffy, who is 29, did offer to list her pediatrician.


“If you need to know about my vaccines and stuff, Dr. Fallan definitely has all that info,” said Duffy, pulling out her phone to look up his information. “Oh, you know what? Turns out he retired five years ago.”


But despite these setbacks, Duffy remains confident in her all-purpose treatment plan.


“Headaches, backaches, sometimes just a stomachache,” said Duffy. “I just pop two to four of those babies back and hope it does something!”


Dr. Kirschtein says she fears for Duffy’s overall health.



“I hoped she at least took vitamins,” said Dr. Kirschtein. “But then she just whipped out a bottle of liquigels and started shaking them, calling them ‘mommy’s little helpers.’”


Duffy says she had originally planned to purchase vitamins on her trip to the CVS Minute Clinic.


“But then I saw the Advil was 2-for-1” said Duffy. “And that’s really all the room I’ve got in my budget for the month.”


Under “insurance” further down the intake form, Duffy simply put “yes please.”