As third-wave feminism continues to grow and empower more and more women, it begs the question: When will women be able to throw hot dogs down hallways? We wanted to experiment with what would happen if we allowed women to participate in the act of lobbing a frankfurter down a long hall. So, that’s what we did. We went to Costco, bought 400 hot dogs and asked three different women to boldly partake in this typically male activity. Here are their stories:
Alice Goldman is a proud mother of eight and a high-level HP executive who once worked directly under Carly Fiorina. When we first spoke with her about the prospect of throwing a hot dog down a hallway, she was a bit hesitant.
“First of all, I have never even eaten a hot dog, so I was pretty skeptical of my abilities,” Goldman tells us. “But then I looked down at my beautiful daughter and realized that that she might want to throw a hotdog down a hallway one day. I knew I had to be an example for her. So I did it! I just went for it.”
Goldman then led us to an empty corridor in her estate. There, we handed her an uncooked hot dog and watched her chuck it all the way to the end of the hallway.
“I felt nothing. Nothing at all. It was beautiful,” she says..
Shirley Blanche is a part-time yoga instructor who was once featured on an episode of “Extreme Couponers.” She reached out to us when she learned of our project. We met her at her studio apartment in Williamsburg where she did a couple of preparatory whisky shots before grabbing a hot dog and stepping outside her apartment into the hallway. Then Blanche threw the hot dog. Afterwards, we asked her how she felt.
“I’m a vegan!” Blanche screamed. “I can’t believe I just did that! Women really can do ANYTHING!”
Adele is a British singer-songwriter whom we had the pleasure of meeting when we snuck onto her tour bus after a live performance at Madison Square Garden. Although she seemed slightly scared at first, she was an absolute darling once we told her about our project.
“Throwing a hot dog down a hallway is something I’ve always wanted to do,” Adele said, in that adorable accent of hers. So we quickly escorted her to the nearest office building and handed her a footlong, which she gracefully underhanded at least 30 feet. Once the ‘dog landed, Adele eyed it as though it were a bad ex-boyfriend. Then she stormed away without saying a word. Brits!
No matter what these women felt after their experience, there’s no denying that each toss was a step forward for women everywhere who have ever felt the burden of not knowing what it’s like to throw a hot dog down a hallway. If you want to change your reality as a woman, we highly recommend getting out there (into the hallway) and throwing a hotdog. Girl power!