It’s Friday night karaoke, and opportunity’s knocking. You’ve just been biding your time, waiting for the right moment to belt like the diva you probably are. You’ve selected the most meaningful, dynamic song in the book. There’s no way this can fail. But as soon as you start singing the first verse, you realize: “Oh shit. This song is a lot higher than I thought it was.” Here are a few classics that aren’t as manageable as you thought they were:
“And I Am Telling You,” from the musical Dreamgirls.
There’s no no no way this nine-minute showstopper won’t impress your colleagues – even if you do break a little on the high notes. Okay, a lot. And the low notes, too. This is awkward. Why couldn’t you have stuck with your go-to Avril Lavigne B-sides?
“Stairway to Heaven” by Led Zeppelin
Singing this eight-minute classic is bound to impress the bar, assuming they haven’t heard it in decades. You’ve never successfully opened your mouth wide enough to hit the high A-flat that drives this jam. Robert Plant can hit that note, and you can’t. You really should have taken voice lessons.
“Eat It” by Weird Al Yankovic
You wanted to show everyone how funny you are, but what you hadn’t realized is that Weird Al is actually a professional vocalist and these notes are freaking high. Sure, the song is basically one sustained high note, and your lungs are weak from years of smoking, but you’ll have the crowd laughing so hard they won’t care. Laughing with you, right?
“Happy Birthday” by Patty Hill and Mildred J. Hill, covered by Marilyn Monroe
So what if Jenny just knocked a Whitney Houston song out of the park? Give the birthday boy something to think about with this underappreciated slow jam. If you’re a bit pitchy, don’t be afraid to sing the song a few times, until you get it close to right. You’re good enough, right?
“Method Man” by the WuTang Clan.
So you didn’t think it was possible – this classic rap song is actually pretty complicated…and you don’t really remember how the singing part goes? This is turning out a lot shittier than you ever imagined.
Sometimes, your ears don’t realize how much work your throat would have to do to make that Top 40 hit happen. These selections are prime examples of that to make the whole bar say, “She should really sit down.”
