Sponsored Beverages That Are Too Sponsored To Be Bad for You

Sometimes you look at a tall, sugary, sponsored drink and can only see the calories. Well, we’re here to tell you that thanks to corporate sponsorships, those calories aren’t quite as bad for you as you might have thought. Drink up guilt-free, because food and beverage companies are giving you the A-Okay! Here are some popular drinks that are just too sponsored to be bad for you:


Skinnygirl Margaritas

With the word “skinny” in the title, you know these margaritas aren’t fattening! Also, because we’ve been paid to talk about them, we are telling you they’re low-cal and might even boost your metabolism? There’s just 100 calories in a four-ounce serving, and even though no one ever drank just four ounces of anything, that sounds like a pretty small amount of calories. Also, did you know that tequila burns fat? We’re putting Skinnygirl’s money where our mouth is, to tell you this drink is not bad for you—at all! Yumm!! We’re getting skinnier by the sip!


Starbucks Cotton Candy Frappuccino

How could a drink this fun be bad? The flavor is “a blend of vanilla bean, raspberry syrup, milk and ice, finished with whipped cream.” Last time we checked, raspberries were fruit and fruit is good for you and we’ve got a big direct deposit in our bank account that says so. Seriously, ask your therapist if having a good time is a bad thing. It’s not. Don’t mention the calories because we’re not telling you what they are because we’re telling you this drink is good for you. Don’t ask questions because stress is bad. Just sit back and enjoy this delicious healthy drink!



Monster Energy Drinks

“Monster Energy drinks aren’t just for men and they aren’t full of sugar,” our sponsors at Monster Energy tell us. At only 27 grams of sugar per serving, Monster Energy drinks have less calories than some other drinks owned by their parent company, probably. And unlike some energy drinks that aren’t sponsoring this article, you don’t have to worry about the dangers of caffeine either, because these drinks actually have less caffeine than certain coffee beverages that we can’t name because they are also a sponsor of ours. Wanna get your day revved up without all the guilt? Grab a Monster! You’ll be glowing in the knowledge that you made a healthy choice!


It can be hard to navigate which drinks on the market are bad for you. Thanks to corporate sponsorship, you can use this handy list to guide your choices to Healthtown, USA!