I did it. I’m finally over Matt, and now I am totally 100% fine. Just to prove it to myself and the world, I went through my apartment and got rid of everything that reminded me of Matt with the minor exception of these 14 things that it just wouldn’t really make sense to part with:
This Swim Team Sweatshirt With His Last Name On It
Sometimes I get cold on the subway home, and wearing a sweatshirt with a last name that’s not mine makes me feel so safe. It’s not about imagining myself taking his name anymore, okay? It’s about safety.
This Quill Pen
It’s super useful for calligraphy and there’s literally no part of me that even thinks about the fact that Matt used this quill to write me love poems before he broke my heart. And with how often I lose pens, it would just be irresponsible to throw it away!
This Eminem CD
I’m not going to throw out a perfectly good CD just because “Till I Collapse” is our song and I don’t have a CD player anymore. I can use it as a plate or even a mirror in a pinch! It’s totally a keeper.
The Letter He Wrote Me From Morocco
Look, I don’t even read the part of the letter where he says he can’t wait to have me in his arms again. I just need this in case I ever forget the capital of Morocco and don’t have my phone on me. I’m serious!!
The Letter He Wrote Me From Shanghai
I don’t know how I’m going to know how to say “excuse me sir where is the men’s restroom” in Chinese if I don’t hang on to it.
The Letter He Wrote Me From Rio De Janeiro
Yes he got it as a souvenir from his trip to Shanghai and told me that he’ll be back for it someday. In this day and age, you can never be too careful and having a sword around the house is just good common sense and self-defense.
This Sex Tape
It’s not for reminiscing about the times when we had infatuated, carnal love for each other. It’s just something for me to study for my next relationship. I’m not about to throw out a TEACHING tool! No I am NOT crying!!
This Half-Eaten Box of Cheez-its
I don’t like Cheez-its but Matt did so I always kept a box for him. But this isn’t about waiting to see if he comes back and being ready for that day whenever it comes.
If you think I’m going to let the fact that he left this here the first night we spent together affect my ability to use this to clean dirt off my white shoes, you are sadly mistaken.
This Empty Beer Bottle
Sure, it’s the last one he ever drank in my apartment before he told me that he was in love with Kelsey and things had to end, but I’m FINE and it’s going to make an adorable flower holder.
The Kleenex I Cried Into When He Left Me
If I get kidnapped and someone needs something with my DNA on it, this is the perfect thing. It’s a lifesaving keepsake.
This Picture of Us
Sure, this adorable picture of me on his back was taken after one of the most perfect days of my life, but more importantly if I don’t hang on to this picture, I won’t be able to immediately recall what 5×7 means and looks like, and I’m not about to give myself that social handicap!
This Bracelet He Actually Got For Kelsey But Gave To Me When I Accidentally Saw It
Sure, he actually brought this bracelet back from Maui to give to his secret girlfriend and when I saw it on his desk and asked what it was, he gave it to me in a panic and continued seeing her behind my back for two months. But if you think wearing it every day is a way of making myself suffer for the wrong I’ve obviously done to lose his love to another then you are WRONG. I just think it’s pretty!!
Ugh. It’s so wonderful to finally be over everything, moving on with my life, and being really okay with the fact that I’ll never see Matt again unless something happens and someone has to call my emergency contact!