‘I Can’t Read Minds!’ Exclaims Man Who Also Can’t Take Hints

After being asked why he did not wash the dishes, 28-year old Caleb Davis told his girlfriend of three years, “I can’t read minds!”


Caleb, who also cannot take hints, held firm in his stance throughout the day.


“I’m not a mind reader,” Davis said upon incurring his girlfriend’s wrath, “How does Rebecca expect me to know exactly what she wants me to do if all she did was mention it several times?”


Althaus says she doesn’t need Davis to be telepathic, she just needs him to decode simple body language and words to intuit the feelings of those closest to him.


“Caleb is a wonderful person, but I learned quickly that subtlety wasn’t going to get me anywhere in this relationship.,” explains Rebecca. “I have to tell him exactly what I want, concisely and clearly, several times before ultimately getting frustrated and screaming it at him. That’s just his communication style.”


“Right, I’m not some magician who can hear people’s thoughts telepathically,” says Caleb.


Recently the couple was trying to decide on dinner and Rebecca made the mistake of naming a restaurant she loved. “She never said that’s where she wanted to order from, she just said she liked it. She was being super passive so I was forced to take things into my own hands and order wings.”


Surprisingly, Davis’ own power to drop hints remains perfectly intact despite his insensitivity to the hints of others.


His mother Cheryl reveals, “Caleb’s condition is unlike anything I’ve seen. Even though he claims to not understand what others are trying to communicate, he’s still as good as ever at guiding us towards what he wants. For instance, just yesterday he brought his dirty laundry over and left it right in the middle of the living room—I got the message loud and clear!”



Davis’ family and friends are committed to supporting him, no matter how stunted his skills of perception may be.


“I’m prepared to spend the rest of this relationship telling Caleb exactly how I feel,” Rebecca confides. “I know how even the lightest guesswork upsets him.”