So you’ve spent your day sexting with reckless abandon, but now that the time has come to make true on all the hot, dirty scenarios you carefully crafted over the span of hours, you find that you’re too tired to actually partake. Don’t worry! You still have time to meticulously walk back all those promising sexts you sent throughout the day and get to bed! Here’s how:
Embrace ambiguous language.
So, you sent a sext saying, “I can’t wait to make you scream” – take liberties with that! While contextually, it might have seemed like you meant you were going to make them scream with pleasure in bed, your broad language allows you to shift the narrative. Maybe you meant they’d scream in fear from a link to a scary YouTube video you sent them, or maybe scream in frustration when you leave them hanging after inevitably falling asleep early in the middle of your sexy talk.
Play around with tone.
Sarcasm is your friend! Experimenting with tone can help you walk back otherwise exhaustively iterated and specifically phrased plans. Oh, you said, “I want you to bend me over and fuck me hard”? Seems like a pretty concrete plan, huh? Nope – you were actually just joking around! They will love this playful side of you, and will immediately forget about the intense sexual tension the two of you had been methodically building all day.
Shift focus to something else.
Sure, sexts are generally hyper-focused on the act of having sex, often in the near future – but that doesn’t mean there aren’t other aspects of your texts you can shift focus to, in order to play down the fact that you’re definitely too tired to follow through on any raunchy acts you described to them today. For instance, you sent a sext saying you wanted to “make a mess” of their bedsheets – use that as a jumping off point to launch into a comprehensive explanation of the history of bed sheets. They’ll learn that bedsheets were first coined in the 15th century, and you’ll get them so bored and tired that it will be a mutual decision to go to bed and save sex for another time. It’s a win-win!
If you follow these steps, you’ll be sure to walk back your sexy promises in no time and get some much-needed shuteye! Just make sure to rest up so you can start the process all over again tomorrow.