How to Be Poly Without Having a Conversation About It

Turning a monogamous relationship into a polyamorous relationship is difficult without communication, but it’s not totally impossible, either. If you’re considering opening up your relationship without saying anything about it to your current partner, then follow the steps below!


Choose another partner.

Some may think that you have to discuss adding another person to the relationship you already have with someone else, but those people are actually dead wrong. All you have to do to make your relationship polyamorous is add another person, or three, and hopefully your current lover goes ahead and finds someone else. too. After all, you guys are poly (even if they don’t know that yet)!




Avoid any conversations about your relationship(s).

After you add a couple more love interests to the equation, you’ll have to be careful not to engage in any taxing convos about the state of your relationship with any of your partners. That’s why any time one of them asks where you’ve been, what you’re doing, or why you keep posting BeReals from other people’s apartments, just tell them that you’re not in the mood to talk about it, for the sake of your mental health. They’ll all totally understand!


If confronted about it, find another new partner.

In some cases, one of the people in your unknowing throuple, quad, or pentad might find out what you’ve been doing and threaten to leave you. In that case, let them! Remember, you can always find another person to add to your relationship and not tell them about any of it either!


Being in a polyamorous relationship for the first time can be nerve-wracking, but not as much when you just don’t say anything about it! If you’re not sure how to broach the subject with your partner, but you really want to date other people, then use these tips to be poly without ever having a conversation about it. You’ll be happy you did, even if no one else is!