There are so many challenges involved in establishing and maintaining relationships. But one of the hardest obstacles is when you have to figure out a series of elaborate clues to escape the room in which your date is talking about his ex-girlfriend. Here are the quickest ways to escape the room, and then the date altogether when he starts talking about his dumb ex.
Get a Lay of the Land
As soon as you realize you are trapped in a room with a man that has, for no reason at all, brought up his ex-girlfriend, take a moment to take in your surroundings. Try to notice everything in the room. Where’s the door? Is there a key? Will you need a code to unlock the key? Is there a secret written on the ceiling? Anything could end up being a clue to how you can get out of here before he starts talking about all the things his ex did wrong. Hurry – he’s already delving into why they broke up!
Put All the Clues in the Same Place
It’s a confusing space you’ve fallen into. One second it’s a date, and the next it’s an elaborately constructed therapy session for him without a clear exit! You don’t want to let your head get all mixed up in the madness, so pick all the clues up around you and put them together. Do the numbers on the wall form an equation that could unlock this box? Write it down! Keeping organized is the only way you will survive when he starts comparing his last ex to the one before her and making huge generalizations about both of them that are clearly not true. Save yourself – there isn’t much time!
Pay Attention to the Details
Remember: There are clues everywhere. He’s telling you about the time that he claims she did something wrong, but if you listen to the story it’s obvious that he was in the wrong and she’s probably pretty cool. This is a clue – a clue that you need to start your escape immediately. He is obviously oblivious, so you might be at the point in your escape room where you realize it might not be as complicated as you thought. You were definitely overthinking it and you can definitely knock that curious-looking puppet from the tall shelf if you just try a little bit harder…
Scream and Scream
The secret they don’t want you to know about escape rooms is that if you just scream and scream, someone will eventually come let you out. The same goes for this guy that has turned his hatred of his ex into a bunch of sweeping generalizations about women. If you start screaming relentlessly, he will probably leave or have you arrested. But any room is better than this room where he’s telling you about how she’s a “narcissist” and a “liar” who “didn’t understand his needs.” You can focus on escaping jail later!
So if you’re trapped in an elaborately designed cage of clues that is a date, know that you can escape. Just try not to lose focus. There are rooms out there that have men in them that don’t bring up their exes constantly or ever. You can get to those rooms. And you will!
