BREAKING: Maria from Accounting is Dating Dat Boi

Yesterday the breakroom at work was abuzz when 29-year-old Maria from accounting confirmed that she is, in fact, dating Dat Boi.

 

A self-proclaimed OkCupid addict, Maria even surprised herself when she fell for, not a man on a dating app, but an incredibly viral meme of a frog riding a unicycle that was uploaded by an anonymous Tumblr user.

 

“I was transfixed by his spindly green forelegs and the musculature of his hind legs,” Maria reminisced. “He was just going round and round on that unicycle, cool as a cucumber. And I just thought to myself, ‘o shit waddup.’”

 

Co-workers were astonished by the revelation, citing that Maria’s type was usually blondes and stockbrokers, not dank memes of tailless vertebrates traveling on one wheel.

 

“Dat boi is not who I expected to see Maria with,” Alexander from Marketing admitted. “For starters, it is a GIF of a green frog riding a unicycle.”

 

There had been rumors around the office that Maria from Accounting might be dating an aggressively spreading Internet meme of a cycling frog for several weeks. According to multiple sources, Maria had been spotted in the company bathroom in early April, staring into the mirror while practicing the phrase “o shit waddup,” to herself, at first in a casual tone, then in a flirty tone, then sultrily.

 

“I thought it might be those Frog and Toad fellas,” said Gloria, 56, who has no idea what a meme is. “You know, they ride a bicycle and are best friends and quarrel over the weather. Turns out, it’s a different animated frog on wheels.”

 

Coworker Cynthia’s suspicions were confirmed when Maria said her new special someone was swinging by the office to pick her up for a lunch date. Upon her date’s arrival, the entire office erupted in seemingly involuntary shouts of “Here come dat boi!”

 

Howard, Maria’s supervisor, reportedly looked up from his Excel Spreadsheet when Dat Boi entered the office and uttered “o shit waddup” in a calm, measured tone.

 

Relieved her secret romance is finally out, Maria from Accounting revealed that she bagged the dank meme nearly two months ago while trolling Reddit at 3 a.m. She first spotted her would-be BF photoshopped into a ShutterStock image of a young professional’s resumé. When she saw an excessively reblogged and poorly compressed version of Dat Boi pasted into a scene from The Fellowship of the Ring two days later, she knew she had to reach out and at least say “o shit waddup.”

 

“You know how it is in the honeymoon phase. You feel like you just see the person you’re dating everywhere,” Maria said, admitting that she had, in fact, seen Dat Boi everywhere on the Internet.

 

When asked if she sees a future for her and Dat Boi, Maria looked off wistfully and said, “I don’t know, it’s really fun now, but he’s a meme. I am sure this thing will get old in a few weeks and I will completely forget about it.”