9 Things to Never Think About

As women, we have enough things to worry about in our day-to-day lives without the added stress of thinking about other things. Some things are so complicated that we risk finding ourselves thinking about them for hours on end. Who has time for that? Do yourself a favor by never thinking about these ten things:


1. Death

Everybody dies. We know this. So, why waste countless hours thinking about it? It’s terrifying and just not worth it. Come to think of it (ack, more thinking!), we’re sorry we wasted any of it typing this up.


2. Circumstance

If you were born in rural Rwanda, you wouldn’t even know that the Internet exists. Imagine that! Now stop it. Yes, some people have it harder than others, but there’s no use scaring yourself with what could have been. Hypotheticals are so 2012.


3. Existence

If you’re not going to think about one thing on this list, make it this one. “What’s the meaning of life?” Are you kidding? So far, no one’s come up with an answer, and no offense, but you probably won’t be the first.


4. Overpopulation

Exponential human growth and limited natural resources?  Uh, no thanks. We have enough trouble managing our own families, am I right?



5. Animals

We call some of them our best friends but we eat others. It’s confusing. Think about it for too long and you’ll never stop having nightmares about childhood pets. We’ll pass.


6. Ethics

When you’re trying to check things off your to-do list, the last thing you need is some wishy-washy moral code to ponder. Be right or be wrong, but be something, you know? If you’re going to devote any time to blurred lines, it should be while belting Robin Thicke in the shower.


7. Organized Religion

Is it your God? Or is it everybody’s God? Why is there only one for your group, but others for other groups? And why do they all have different rules about pork products? Ugh, don’t think about it.


8. Gender Politics

Does using our objectification to our advantage make us any less objectified? Should feminism’s goal be equal rights and freedoms for women, or the situational adaptation of rules base on biological identification factors? This is probably already giving you a headache, so don’t even bother.


9. Technology’s Impact on Human Evolution

As you’re reading this, there are probably 87 unread emails in your inbox, two hours’ worth of Instagrams to catch up on, three viral videos that you are missing, and at least six push notifications on your phone. So excuse you if you don’t have time to ruminate over the evolutionary implications of being connected.