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Scary! This Might Be the Best Version of Yourself

‘Youth Is Wasted on the Young,’ Says Old Person Who Is Wasting the Old

Autopsy Confirms Bite Marks on Corpse Came From Someone With Beautiful Smile

Nice! Mom Still Holding Grudge on Your Behalf

Why I’ve Outsourced My Sexts to ChatGPT

First Date Ideas That Are Adventurous but Not So Adventurous You’ll Be Victim-Blamed if He Kills You

Awkward! Woman Says Dog Is Her Best Friend, But He’s Never Said It Back

4 Superfoods to Stop Your Organs From Depreciating on the Black Market

Ambulance Chaser? Woman’s Reply to Viral Tweet Going Semi-Viral

Liar? Baby Says Skincare Routine Is Just ‘Drinking Lots of Water’

REPORT: New Socks Fucking Slap

How to Get a Man to Open Up, but Not So Much That the Whole World Hates Him

Woman Prefaces Porn Search With ‘I Wouldn’t Want This in Real Life But’

The Best Master’s Degrees to Give You Two More Years of Purpose

‘This Is My Year,’ Says Recently Fired Friend Whose Husband You’re Fucking

Celebrity Plastic Surgery Fails That Look Almost as Bad as Your Regular Face

Aw! Random Person on Reddit From 10 Years Ago Going Through Exact Same Thing as You Are Right Now

QUIZ: Where Were You on the January 6th Sentencing of Jen Shah?

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