Woman Successfully Milks Last Squeeze of Shampoo for Seven Showers

As of this morning, Annabelle Malloy has successfully milked the last squeeze of her Head and Shoulders Green Apple shampoo for the seventh shower.


“I’m not a wasteful person,” Malloy claims. “The environment is so important to me. I also keep forgetting to go to CVS.”


Malloy has prolonged her last squeeze of shampoo before, but seven showers is a new personal record for her. During her last attempt, she made it only five showers before giving up and secretly using her roommate’s shampoo until she finally made it to the drugstore.


“I’m really glad I was able to make it last that long,” says Malloy. “While I was sad to see the last drop of shampoo go, I knew that I did my absolute best.”


Malloy explains that the last week has been a learning experience.


“I knew I could make that last squeeze count,” she says. “I found a lot of new ways to get shampoo out of the bottle: Leaving it upside down in the shower, smacking it against the shower wall before using it, hitting the bottle from the top twice, the bottom once, and the top again, or just squeezing until my knuckles were white.”


“Honestly, you really don’t need that much shampoo,” she adds. “By the end of the week, I was massaging just a small dot into my hair, and it barely even looked greasy.”


Kristin Moore, Malloy’s roommate, isn’t sure that her methods were effective.


“By the end, I could definitely tell she wasn’t washing her hair properly,” says Moore. “She tried tying it back in a ponytail, but I could still see the greasiness.”


“I even offered to grab her some shampoo while I was at Target,” Moore added. “She said no because she was going to do it later. She didn’t.”



Despite Moore’s opinions, Malloy finds her accomplishment triumphant.


“I’m proud of myself,” says Malloy. “My advice to other people who want to make their shampoo last is to never give up. Even when all I would get was that airy fart sound from the bottle, I knew there had to be more product in there.”


“When I finally did make it to CVS, I bought a travel size shampoo to save money,” she adds. “I mean, why not, now that I know how long I can make one bottle last.”