Woman Giving Up on Creative Dream After Three Months Thinks She Will Make It Through Law School

In a developing story from Washington, D.C., 22-year-old Ashley Simmons thinks she will make it through three years of law school after giving up on her dreams of becoming a novelist just three months into writing the outline for her first short story.


“Writing fiction requires so much patience and is such a huge time commitment,” says Ashley, who spent the past three months telling anybody who would listen that she was submitting her first novel for this year’s Pulitzer Prize. “So that’s why I figure at least for now I should take the easy route and become a lawyer.”


Although Ashley has not yet taken an LSAT practice exam, she is confident that she will be a natural.


“How hard can it be, really? If Elle Woods can do it, so can I,” insists Ashley, who is currently recording a Legally Blonde themed video to send to law schools. “I think it would help my chances if they could see my personality and that I go the extra mile to pursue my goals.”



Ashley’s mother, Sylvia Simmons, confirms that Ashley gave up on the video submission after her first take came out too blurry.


“I have always supported her passions when she was growing up. She pursued ballet but stopped when she could not stand on her toes after two classes. We got her into filmmaking, horseback riding, computer programming, painting, piano, and even paid for opera lessons in Italy,” explains Sylvia. “Her father and I are hoping this law school stuff works out.”


Ashley continues to remain undaunted by the journey to pursue her J.D.


“I think law school will be really good for me. Just that structure and security,” says Ashley. “And I know it’s doable. I mean, there are so many lawyers! Like, one could say it’s an oversaturated field. Anyway, it’s gonna be great. I’m hoping for Harvard or Yale.”


Sources closest to Ashley report that after learning about tort law, she is currently Googling alternative career paths.