In a developing story out of New London, CT, Betty Allison is not completely sure if the butt scrub she recently purchased did what it’s supposed to do.
“Like, does my butt feel smoother? Sure,” said Betty. “But, is that the point? Unsure. Also, what if I used it on my elbows?”
Betty does have a few guesses as to the purpose of booty exfoliant, but is still unsure why exactly she bought it.
“It’s either to prevent butt pimples or to get rid of butt pimples that already exist or to make your butt soft or to….make your butt shiny?” she said. “Are any of those sounding correct?”
“I honestly have no clue what anyone could need a butt scrub for,” Betty added. “I just like my butt a lot so this seemed like a good investment.”
Other consumers are equally confused.
“I had a hunch that it was to make your butt, like, glowy?” said Vanessa Nunes. “Does that sound right?”
“Oh that actually makes more sense than my assumption,” said Deidre Wu. “I thought it was, like, a laxative? This actually explains a lot.”
“Or at least something to make your ass shiny,” Deidre added.
“Exactly!” interjected Betty. “Is it not?”