Last night while you were riding the L train home from work, a white woman struck up a conversation with you that you already knew wasn’t going to be good.
68-year-old Melissa Wurthbridge just wanted to hear how your day was, and also that she is the sole exception among white people when it comes to perpetrating racism.
“Hi, I love your hair,” Melissa said, which might have been an okay compliment if she didn’t also try to touch it. “Coming home from work?”
Before you could finish saying “yes,” Melissa, who considers herself one of the “good” white people, was quick to jump in.
“Oh, me too. Well, not work, but I volunteer,” Melissa stated, eagerly awaiting congratulations. “That’s why I help out at my community garden now. You know, with underprivileged youth?”
This unsolicited and random share reportedly confused you.
“I’m not sure what her garden is doing to dismantle systemic racism,” you say. “I told her that, and she got really flustered, then somehow found a way to bring up that she dated a Black guy in college.”
When you finally stood up to get off at your stop without saying that Melissa’s efforts somehow canceled out her white privilege, she started to panic.
“Have a good day!” she called out after you. “I loved Hamilton, by the way!”
Multiple reports corroborate that Melissa has kept having these kinds of one-way conversations on the train with different women of color.
At press time, it seems that she will not stop until she gets one of these women to explicitly tell her that she’s not racist, or until she gets invited to someone’s cookout.