Study Finds It Technically Possible That Your Mother Is Having A Mind-Blowing Orgasm Right At This Very Second

A new study from Yale finds that it is within the realm of possibility that in this exact moment, your mother is having an all-consuming, massive orgasm right now.


“I know it’s not fun for any of us to think about,” says Dr. Sherman, who led the research team. “But it is very much a possibility.


Dr. Sherman went on, soberly, about the findings.


“Listen, humanity doesn’t like to concern itself with these kinds of possible realities, but that doesn’t mean they’re not there. At this moment your mom could be pleasuring herself, or being pleasured by your father, or someone else entirely. Hell, I could even be the one giving her an earth-shattering orgasm by the time you’re reading this.”


Asked whether he had any intentions of trying to make your mother come, Sherman was quiet for a moment.



“That’s not really that point. And that’s what I’m trying to stress to everyone. It’s not about how or why; it’s just a simple matter of probability. And unfortunately for you and I, the simple truth is that our mothers’ backs might be arching, toes curled, mouths agape in ecstasy in this very moment.”


“There’s nothing we can do but accept that fact.”