Should You Do An Elimination Diet for Dairy, Caffeine or Those Magic Beans a Witch Sold to You?

Think you might have a food allergy, but aren’t sure what you should eliminate from your diet? An elimination discovery may be the most helpful thing you can do for your body! However, you will need to eliminate suspect foods one at a time and it can be difficult to tell whether you should start with dairy, caffeine or those magic beans a witch sold to you. All three could be wreaking havoc equally, so use this guide to determine which you should say buh-bye to – dairy, caffeine, or those mysterious and bitter-tasting magic beans you bought from behind a decrepit old cemetery last winter?


Are you experiencing stomach pain, acne or are you growing at an alarming rate?

If you’re experiencing stomach pain or acne, your safest bet is to start eliminating dairy or caffeine. If you’re growing at an alarming rate, however, you should definitely a take a day off from those magic and possibly cursed beans a witch sold to you. Based on what the medical community currently knows about cursed beans, it’s almost certain that is what’s causing you to shoot toward the sky at such a frightening speed, so try replacing them with black beans or pinto beans. You should return to a regular-heighted, 5’4”-ish woman within several months. But if you don’t, damn! Try eliminating dairy or caffeine.


Have you always had symptoms, or did they start right after a wizened finger beckoned to you from behind a decrepit cemetery stone?

If you’ve been consuming dairy products or caffeine for a long time and have always displayed allergy symptoms, start by cutting back on either product. If your symptoms developed after a witch beckoned to you from behind a decrepit cemetery stone with her wizened finger after she whispered into your ear, “BE WARNED” after waving her thin long fingers across your face, then sold you a pocketful of magic beans for the price of your soul, consider eliminating the beans first. It should go without saying that right now they’re the #1 suspect for what’s causing your alarming growth. Any un-hexed bean substitute from like a Kroger’s or something should tide you over until you can confirm as much. And stop hanging out in cemeteries, ya goof!



Does your family have a history of allergies, or an ancient feud with a maleficent power?

A family history of dairy or caffeine intolerance could be an indicator you have one as well. But an ancient family feud with a maleficent power is the surest sign of all that you’ve been duped into scarfing down magic beans that vibrated a little in your hand and also had the power to turn you into a giantess. I mean regular beans may make you bloated, but magic beans will make you bloated but also like 40 feet tall. That sucks! Put down those beans right away, and pray they don’t also give you acne.


Either the foods or the magic beans you’re eating every day could be what’s throwing your body out of whack, but this thorough guide can help you figure out which!