Republican Lawmakers Struggle to Pronounce ‘Vice President Harris’

Kamala Harris David Perdue

Following the election that led president-elect Biden and vice president-elect Harris to victory, Republican lawmakers across the country are struggling to pronounce the foreign, complicated phrase, “Vice President Harris”.

 

“I can pronounce Kamala just fine, if I really want to,” said senator David Perdue. “What I can’t wrap my head around is this crazy idea that I’m supposed to call her Vice President Whatever-Whatever.”

 

Many members of the GOP are struggling to catch up with the reality that not only a woman, but a woman of color, will be taking the seat of Vice President next January.

 

 

“It’s not that I don’t want to say it,” says Republican congressional nominee Craig Keller. “My mouth is simply incapable of stringing that series of words together.”

 

“Can I at least add ‘so-called’ before it?’” asks Trump adviser Judy Shelton. “It’s just so much easier to pronounce that way.”

 

Republican lawmakers are struggling to form the words and unwilling to try saying something unfamiliar, like “Kamala” or “The Biracial Woman Who Is One Heartbeat Away From the Presidency.”

 

When asked if they will put in an effort to learn how to pronounce this new phrase, the GOP unanimously agreed: “Absolutely not.”