Want to be mad at your boyfriend, but he won’t give you a good enough reason? Ugh – boyfriends just don’t get it! Not to worry: here are some new ideas for how to add much-needed conflict to your otherwise pleasant and stable relationship.
He Stopped Complimenting You
When you started dating, he told you that you were beautiful all the time! It’s almost like he was trying to get you to be his girlfriend; but once you became his girlfriend, he thought he didn’t need to try to get you to be his girlfriend anymore. What a dick!
It Seems Like He Might Have Almost Forgotten Your Birthday
Sure, he took you out to dinner and got you a great gift, and surprised you by having all your friends meet you afterwards for drinks. But how do you know he would have done any of that if Facebook hadn’t reminded him it was your birthday? It all seemed so lazy and cobbled together. Punish him by getting mad about this at the bar, so your friends can be sure to see how much of a bastard he is.
He Either Works Too Much or Not Enough
Maybe he spends too much time at the office. Maybe he’s recently unemployed and it has been “hard for him.” Maybe he started a new creative project that he claims is “giving him fulfillment.” Whatever the circumstance, there’s absolutely no way to achieve the perfect work-life balance, so anything he says or does can be used against him!
He Has Friends Who Aren’t You Sometimes
When a guy has friends who aren’t you it only means one thing: he probably spends time with them sometimes. If he didn’t have those friends he would either be spending that time with you, or he would be depressed and alone—both preferable to him spending time with other humans who aren’t you. Throw your disdain for his social choices in his face as soon as he walks through the door, so he’ll know that being at home with you is where he really belongs.
He Knows Who Kate Upton Is
She’s hot and he shouldn’t be looking at her! An awareness of Kate Upton’s existence on Earth is an invitation for an all-out, door-slamming extravaganza. Ladies, if he knows who she is, you better make sure he never forgets that you know that he knows who she is.
Remember: being able to find fault in any situation is the key to healthy communication in a relationship.